Hi you wonderful peeps!!!
Sometimes, I'm not in the mood to chat about recipes- my heads too caught in the clouds, daydreaming and manifesting my destiny by throwing things out to the universe. Last May I was approached by Foodytv.com to try out for my own cooking and lifestyle show. I flew out to New York, shot a pilot and WHAM! the rest is history.
Everyone that knows me, knows this has been my lifelong goal since I was just starting out in my career. Some people laughed. Some folks doubted and a few cheered me on. I stayed on course. I put forth all my energy, all my focus, all my drive and all my heart.
By no surprise, I've had many opportunities. I used to get really excited and tell the whole world what was going on- and then I learned, it always seems to work out when I don't share my excitement too early.... I don't say I've had opportunities to brag.... I say that for the exact OPPOSITE reason. Those opportunities never panned out. And the more they didn't pan out, the more people doubted me. The more people doubted me, the more determined I became. The more determined I became, the faster I burnt myself out until one fine day in 2013: my whole life came crashing down like a pile of rocks.... I was spent. I was done for. I almost willingly gave up my career. I almost willingly walked away from my goal and almost willingly lost sight of my dream. I floundered in darkness for a year and a half. I dabbled on the dark side. I drank excessively. I partied to extremes. I spent money like I was on lifestyles of the rich and famous- and I completely lost sight of how much I had accomplished all by myself over the last 10 years of my career. I was miserable. I was depressed. I was unhealthy. I was unable to smile. I had lost any sense of joy and had no creative drive left in me. I was broken.
Thankfully, I have family and friends that TRULY love me. These people look after me way more than I could ever care for myself. They prayed, I prayed and somehow, I woke up one day and the world looked a little brighter. I picked myself up and out of the dirt. I brushed myself off and took a deep breath.
That was a close call. I had surrendered to the dark side and got swallowed up whole. I am forever grateful that the bleak and black hole I fell into spit me back out.... like garbage.
I'm not meant to dabble with danger like that. I'm not meant to hover in shadows. I'm meant to fly with the eagles.
I've had a few close calls in life. I've had a few times where I've lost my way, felt helpless, hopeless and empty inside- and somehow, through grace, I've recovered my dignity- pulled up my bootstraps and stepped out of the shadows.
I'm forever grateful for my life. I believe that happiness is designing your life exactly how you want it. I am happier and more fulfilled now, after willingly giving up a year and half of my life. Sometimes it take me having a full on breakdown, in order to have a full on break through.
If you can relate, I'd love to hear your stories of success and gratitude for living. Thanks for taking the time to read my story and being willing to learn a little bit more about me and my journey. Life to live, love to give!!! Wishing you all a beautiful and prosperous life.